What's your policy for involving significant others in your Salsa life?

I'm very careful about dating people on the dance scene (you will see them night after night) unless we have a real connection, but on the other hand find it hard to imagine not dating someone who dances. Who else will be understanding of the fact that I go out dancing 3-4 nights a week and spend whole weekends at congresses?

Dance is a lifestyle more than a hobby.

Geo-

No one listens to me when I share this advice but I like giving it anyway. To people who are new to the latin dancing scene and who love coming out to learn and dance salsa, I say don't date anyone from salsa for a year. Come out, dance, socialize, enjoy, dance some more... etc. After you fully experience all the things that make the dance scene cool and fun for at least a year, go go ahead and risk jacking it all up by dating your dancing buddies :) If things don't work out at least you got 1 year of untainted good times in.

But like I said, no one ever takes that advice when delivered orally so I don't expect and different here.
Good Luck out there!

Good advice Jamin.
My last serious relationship came about through the Salsa scene. Although we danced a couple times a week until closing, we had other common interests and took the time to enjoy those as well. The first break up was hard since by then we frequented the same places & shared some of the same friends. Both of us were hurting & it was painful seeing one another dance with others.It was uncomfortable for our friends. When we got back together we had an agreement that if we broke up again we would respect each other. I think we both had matured. Eventually, it was an amicable parting and his job had him traveling to other parts of the state so we rarely saw each other. When we did meet up we shared a dance or two, talked, & went our separate ways. It took me a few years to get over him, his good qualities were great.
Since then my dating has been from outside of the salsa scene(just happended that way), nothing serious so far. I was too busy with dance & practice to nurture a relationship and I didn't want to include them in that part of my life if they weren't seroius about me. I've been asked if I would date anyone seriously who didn't dance by all my friends. I have mixed feelings about it. Dancing is a passion for me. I gave up partner dancing up for many years during my marriage. My former spouse didn't and wouldn't dance. His passion was restoring classic cars.
I guess my next life partner will either have to be seroius about dancing, be willing to learn to dance (not just temporarily) , or be very understanding of my love for it. I don't believe one should give up what they love for another person (unless it is self destructive). Don't know that I can or want to separate my dance life from my "other" life. It is all who I am. I believe a relationship should bring out the best in each person, not the worst . That isn't saying conflict doesn't arrise, it is how we handle conflict that matters.
Sharon

Dating someone in the salsa scene is like two-edged sword: You can successfully carve out a mutually understood relationship where dancing is concerned, or you can put yourself at risk of having your heart stabbed up a bit. There are no easy answers. It depends on priorities and what a person really seeks in life. If dance is more than just a pasatiempo, then dating a salsa dancer, or at least someone who is willing to learn to dance, seems necessary. But if family, kids, and a career are at the top of the list, then one would have to do some serious reflecting as to just where salsa fits into the grand scheme of things.

While I've not been too tempted to date inside of the salsa scene for many obvious and prior-stated reasons, I did, for a brief moment, allow someone to be a part of my salsa world. He wasn't a salsa dancer...yet, but he was willing and able to learn. But when that move came to light as an error, the disappointment (okay, I admit, and pain) was still there. The point is the following: For me, dancing salsa brings me insurmountable joy, a feeling, un escape, that I don't find anywhere else on the face of this amazing planet. When I'm on la pista dancing, I can't help but smile...really smile! I feel happy; I feel complete. Bringing anyone into that blissful environment changes the equation, salsa dancer or not.

My best advice to all of the beautiful faces I've come to know through the salsa scene is this: Never lose your joy in dancing salsa. Keep it always just for you, for self. And if a face should come into your life and then go, make sure that he or she doesn't take your joy of dancing salsa with them.

Mari

Whatever will be will be.... is how I feel about el amor and dancing salsa. I think what is wrong is when someone EXPECTS something to happen, or looks for it by only trying to date dancers. No one should limit themselves in love. I hope that we can all be Mama Nellie's one day and dance forever, forever but that just may not always happen. Dancing is, of course, a passion of every one of us reading this, but hopefully, you and the one you love share the love for listening to the music, conversation, trust, respect, goals, dreams, values, morals. spirituality and everything that connects us to a person, not just the physical ,because that is superficial. I have found so far that if someone cares enough about you, and I have found someone that does (not a salsero but maybe on his way) they will try to understand your passion, and that inviting them to feel it is a beautiful thing. If they are secure in themselves and you have developed trust by showing them your world then you have that world to share. Dancing is an art and it can be appreciated from a distance as well. As long as your better half knows that dancing for you is about the art and the joy it brings to express one's self to a clave that is out of control then they should see that coming through! I have also been through an experience of an ugly breakup with a salsa dancer, let's just put it this way, " What Glitters is not always Gold" So you take a break, get over them and then you keep on dancing like you were before, because you know that at least will always be real and true......

Great advice and commentary on pro's and con's of dating a salsa dancer. The ideas expressed reflect what I experienced with my former girlfriend. Short term interest in salsa leading to lack of understanding for my love of the dance. Good to know I'm not the only one dealing with this concern.

JayB